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By Bridget Smith
I love the holidays. They make winter bearable to me. I think the food and festivities with family and friends are the best parts, but like most of us, I enjoy the gift giving as well. (Of course, receiving is fun too.)
I take pride in finding the perfect gift for everyone on my list – you won’t find me buying a gift card to the mall. When I learn something about someone, I make a note on my gift list so I remember when the holidays roll around. (Yes, I am one of those people.) For example, I’ve always known that my husband is a huge Rolling Stones® fan. But when a list of the top 10 Stones songs came out recently, he said some were from an album he didn’t have. (News to me, as it looks like we have at least 10 of their albums in our CD rack.) There’s a stocking stuffer!
The problem is, I have too many gift ideas. The “perfect” gifts really start adding up once I’m shopping. Holiday debt is something we all try to avoid, but inevitably many of us fall into it. This year, I’m determined to stick to a budget. But that’s easier said than done.
I asked some friends and colleagues how they handle their money around the holidays. Food is a common money-saving strategy, and one I employ. I love to cook, so making cheese wafers, cheese muffins (cheese is my specialty) or cookies is fun. But the drawback is I am a perfectionist, and I want my food presentation to be something you’d see in a Martha Stewart magazine. The cellophane bags and ribbon can really add up -- though they do make the food taste that much better! I’m looking for less expensive ways to wrap my food gifts this year.
One co-worker has decided to forego presents for her family and contribute to a charity instead. This is a wonderful idea that I may try with my parents the next time we spend the holidays with my in-laws. My parents scrimped and saved all their lives, and now they are enjoying their retirement. They buy pretty much everything they want, and I certainly can’t afford what they aren’t buying for themselves. So a contribution to a charity may be more meaningful than more stuff in their house.
Many friends with large families use the name-drawing system. The names of all the members of their family are put in a hat and they only buy a present for the person whose name they draw. There is still the build-up to the big day when all the gifts are opened, but it’s a lot easier on the wallet. My husband and I want to suggest this to his family, though we’re not sure how it will go over. Maybe suggesting we all buy gifts for couples instead of individuals might be a better way to start -- that way we could sort of break the family in before tossing out the name-in-a-hat idea.
But of course, there are always problems with these strategies. A colleague has tried several tactics with her family and there always seems to be a problem. The year they drew names and put a limit on the cost of the gift, her mother-in-law arrived with gifts for everyone. Last year, their family decided they wouldn’t exchange gifts at all, and instead pooled $250 to make a meal for a local battered women’s shelter. But when they arrived with the dinner, they discovered the shelter already had plenty of food, and the director didn’t even invite them to stay for the meal.
Which brings us to the real lesson in all of this. It’s not about the gifts or how much you spend. We hear this all the time and ignore it, but it’s true. If your effort to save money while giving thoughtful gifts blows up every year, it doesn’t matter. In the end, you have some good stories to share and laugh at, and more money in your wallet.
Published on January 30, 2007